Besides his amazing makeup skills and depth of knowledge on everything beauty, another reason why we love working with celebrity makeup artist Larry Yeo is his (often brutal) honesty. When you need someone to tell you your foundation colour is wrong, or your K-pop inspired brows are ridiculous, he’s your guy. So buckle up for #TuesdaysWithLarry, where the makeup maestro dishes out beauty tips, tricks and advice with a big spoonful of sass and spice.
We understand the need to know what’s ‘new’, but at the same time, there’s always something trending that makes no sense. So much so that when we eventually look back on it; it ends up looking more stupid than the bombastic hair and red-pink blush contouring from the ’80s.
Actual photo of women in China taking part in the A4 paper challenge, Photo: Guardian
Take the Belly Button Selfie from China, where twisting your arm awkwardly to touch your belly button apparently means you having a good figure; or that A4 paper challenge, which supposedly means you have an ideal waistline if it fits an A4-sized sheet of paper.
Obviously the brainless failed to realise how short or skinny you have to be in order to have that waistline and still have a proportional figure.
The last time my waist fit within the width of an A4-size paper, I was 11. Now at 185cm/6"1' tall, I’d break in half if I had that waistline.
Social media seems to be reminding us that if jellyfish can survive millions of years without a brain, some people can too.
Perhaps that is why we’re obsessed with that liquid lip kit we bought from an ‘Instagram famous’ celebrity because we believe we might get Restylane-injected perfected lips with that one swipe; or that overnight cream that promises you will have a well-rested look the next day with just one usage; or that anti-aging serum that promises ‘fewer lines in less than 7 days’. #Whatever
Looking through Instagram, I’m constantly bored by horribly overdrawn Instagram brows; where you end up looking like one of the characters from the Real Wives of Atlanta or some third-tier celeb from a non-primetime show that nobody watches.
Now let's talk about the many WTF Instagram trends.
1. Rainbow Highlighters
Photo: @bitter.lace.beauty via Instagram
The sheer highlighter craze that appeared recently comprises the colours of the rainbow (created by Etsy store Bitter Lace Beauty).
Remember that we highlight to enhance our dimensions.
It doesn't work if you want the whole rainbow on your face. It looks like you’ve captured Rainbow Dash of My Little Pony and ground her into dust and applied her ashes on your face. This form of product makes you look like your makeup was rejected... from the 1970s.
2. Glitter tears
Photo: @smvirginia via Instagram
The look was inspired/copied from a catwalk beauty look found on Burberry’s Fall/Winter 2016 runway and warped into an Instagram trend as a ‘wearable’ look.
Sure, it’s a good look if you want to look like you are a party animal, vomiting on the sidewalk from excessive alcoholic intake at the end of the night. #EditorialLookNotMadeForRealLife
3. Over-lined Lips
Photo: @kyliejenner via Instagram
This is not a new makeup technique but it saw a surge in popularity due to a family of injected lips with their own reality TV show.
The look is great because it teaches Millennials that lip liner is a need.
Overdrawing, however, is ridiculous. It forces the user to overdraw everything on their face to match the lips. The brows, eye makeup, lashes and face contours are all amped up...just to match the lips.
Sometimes when I see someone do that, I will think I’ve walked into a drag show or circus performance.
Photo: @liveglam.co via Instagram
To use contouring and highlighting on feet.
Now this is another story about contouring that I would like to rattle on about but I will leave it for another #TuesdaysWithLarry.
The only thing I will say is this, do not be a dumba** and do that. Your feet move and rub against each other, how long you think that contour will stay on?
5. Multi-Mask Usage
Photo: @__s_o_f_y__ via Instagram
The placement of different masks to target specific skin condition on the face or one after the other.
There’s nothing new about using condition-specific masks on the face — I have been recommending that since my start in cosmetics 20 years ago.
Some even recommend using a mattifying mask before using a hydrating sheet mask on the face. My answer to that is "What the f*** for?".
Use an appropriate mask that suits what you need, and use another a few days later for another concern.
Putting one after the other is just plain wasteful and silly.
BTW, masking everyday isn't beneficial to the skin as it might be detrimental to your skin's health.
6. Big, Long Lashes
Photo: @hudabeauty via Instagram
Long fake thick lashes on your eyes that make you look like it is time for your face to get a wax.
It all is about proportion. That Internet guru with her fake lashes looks great on Instagram. But face-to-face, you just don't know where to look, as the fake lashes look like blackened, possessed gills about to attack you.
Also if your eyes are in a smaller shape like mine, putting on those lashes will make your eye look smaller as the lashes will overwhelm the whole face. We have seen it happen on some acquaintances, and we know how horrifying it looks.
I understand for some, the lashes are their security blanket but without the matching brows to frame the face, everything looks off.
To get out of this Instagram beauty rut, all of us have to learn to embrace our eye and face shape.
Embrace who you are, not bury your face into a pile of cement.
For more #TuesdaysWithLarry, check out #TuesdaysWithLarry: Bid Farewell To Your Cosmetics Graveyard or #TuesdaysWithLarry: Horrors From The Beauty Retail Floor. For more on beauty, head here.